You can often see people selling things out on the street. Puppies. Little baby chicks (ideally, these should be pink, green or blue). This month I've seen a guy, on two occassions, attempting to sell a rock. An actual rock. It was about the size of a small child's head, light grey in colour, with some dark grey circles on it.
A guy and his rock
Apparently this pattern makes it special, and therefore commands a price of something in the 4-digit range. (I sincerely hope that the guy that was selling that thing is still there - if she's not then it may indicate that someone has bought it. If that is the case, I may feel compelled to track down said buyer and beat him, or her, senseless. If only to get my hands on the rock, obviously.)
Another great job is the guy THAT PEOPLE ACTUALLY GIVE MONEY TO that will design a signature for you. Apparently it's cool to have a cool signature. Apparently people are too dumb to come up with one on their own.
Then there's the young ladies who clap for a living. Literally - clapping. Their task is to stand at the front of a shop and clap their hands together. I understand the idea behind this is simply to attract attention; once you've glanced over in their general direction, you will inevitably be drawn into the store where you will empty your wallet. I wonder what rigorous selection-procedural hoops need to be jumped through to reach those dizzying career heights.
Possibly the occupation with the largest number of workers in China also fits into the category of that's-not-really-a-job-is-it. Last, but by no means least, it is the good folks that stand by the door of so many stores and restuarants, and welcome you inside. Literally: Just stand there and say huan ying guang lin ("Welcome, and please grace us with your presence"). Then once you get inside, customers are often vastly outnumbered by the number of shop assistants or waitresses. Just ordering food in a restaurant herecan be a 3-waitress job. One to hold the menu, one to write the order, one to just stand by (in case of emergency?).
I'm told this may be partly in response to the fact that the population here is just so damn big. There aren't nearly enough jobs to go around, so jobs are just invented. In a situation like the one described above (shops, restaurants) I suspect the over-abundance of staff is meant to be a sign that the business is successful and can offer great service.
To be fair, I once had a non-job. My sole task: to arrange files in alphabetical order.
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